[she hums a tiny chuckle.] Boy, you're really living up to the Touch n' Feels nickname.
[except jinx is the one with heat flooding her cheeks and ears as she buries her face a little deeper in her friend's chest. but there's a smile on her, despite pressing on her lower lip with her teeth to suppress it. jinx doesn't let that comment linger for too long as she shifts her head just a touch to no longer shield her blush.]
Hey, uhm. ... I just wanted to say, "Thank you." For, I dunno, being with me. Besides my old man and my kid, this is the longest anyone chose to stay. And... you've been a great help to me. I—I know I don't always... show it. I suck at that, eh heh heh. But... the voices back off more when you're around. I think you've got them scared.
[ Even with the fabric between them, Sharon can feel the shape of Jinx's smile pressed against her—the faint curve of her cheek, warm and firm. When she shifts and catches sight of the blush spreading across Jinx's face, something hot stirs beneath Sharon's ribs, a slow burn that settles deep in her chest. She smiles in return as the other girl murmurs her gratitude.
It isn't needed, but the appreciation hums through their tether all the same. They're standing in the same place, in more ways than one, learning how to live with people who actually care. It's strange and new for both of them, a shared kind of growing pain. ]
As they should be. [ Said with quiet conviction as she reaches down to brush Jinx's bangs from her eyes. ] Everyone should be scared of me—especially if they hurt people I care about.
[ Those tormenting voices might just be shards of Jinx's own mind, but that wouldn't stop Sharon from wanting to stop them all the same. ]
[it's the little things that seem to have jinx tripping over herself; the way sharon sweeps her locks away from her gaze causes her world to swirl around her. it's not in a seasick sort of way, but a pleasant spin like a ferris wheel. it speeds up every so often, sure, but only to gain momentum, and it's still pretty enjoyable.
sharon might notice a change in jinx's expression, her cheeks appearing fuller for some reason and her eyes becoming large and doe-like. maybe it's just a trick of the eye, or maybe there are two sides of her, and she doesn't let this one out enough. whatever is happening, the bluenette keeps quiet as the blonde speaks—her stare swapping from her blues to her lips.]
... Yeah.
[the word finally spills: hyperfocusing more between her two targets than she needs to. reality and the dreamscape are two "different reals"—something that sharon had said to her, and jinx finds herself wondering at night if moments like this...like their kiss, for example, are only meant to stay in the "other reality". it probably would be for the best to not let that cross over, and yet... she catches herself ogling at them when she shouldn't.
sometimes, she wants to ask her friend if she thinks back on that dream, the good part of it, but she's too afraid of what the answer would be, too nervous to face any kind of rejection, embarrassment, or ache. some things are better left unsaid, they say, and this... this might be one of those things. still, her hand grips softly on the fabric of her friend's attire without her permission, and the lump in her throat is swelling even when she hadn't eaten anything that would cause her to choke. ]
I have a secret. It's something I've learned about myself and my powers, something that I can do. And I've been keeping it to myself because... I felt people would take advantage of me if they knew somehow. But. I wanna tell you what it is; I want you to know about it.
[ There's no missing the way Jinx's gaze flickers between her eyes and her lips, and a nervous heat coils low beneath Sharon's ribs. She doesn't let her thoughts wander to the dream often—between her death and the severed tether to Kalmiya, it's too much to think about. Still, there are moments when her mind drifts: to Jinx's touch, the rhythm of their movements, the feel of her lips, until the memory curdles, unraveling into that same awful, unshakable reminder.
When Jinx's fingers catch the fabric of her soft, paint-stained pajama shirt, Sharon can't help but wonder what's coming, what question might spill out next. But instead, the other girl starts talking about a secret. About something people might use against her. She straightens, just a little, without breaking contact. It's a subtle shift, but her attention sharpens. She knows Jinx's power, knows how precious water is here, but what could anyone really take from her?
Part of her wants to ask why. Why tell her this? With the way Sundowning has been eating at her, trust doesn't seem like a wise gamble. But what she says instead is a soft, careful, and painfully curious: ] What is it?
[her throat runs dry almost instantly; reconsideration weighs heavy on her shoulders and her heart. she is halfway there already, and there's really no room for her to take back her words—not when it seems like she has her friend's full attention. jinx could lie or come up with something else (she is carrying a lot of secrets after all), but she meant it when she said that sharon's been a big help to her, and so... she is someone to be trusted. right? she wouldn't hurt her later; she cares and likes her okay enough.]
Has it ever crossed your mind how I've made it here after busting up some creatures without a scratch on me?
[because that's pretty strange, isn't it? how she spent an hour doing whatever with the hosts and arrived here unscathed. in fact, that's been happening quite a lot with her. a sheepish smile flings her friend's way before clearing her throat.]
Ahem, well. Uh... that's because I heal myself. And people, too. With my tears, my sweat, saliva, or just about anything wet regarding me.
If you're feeling under the weather, poisoned, or have a crick in your neck, I can get rid of it. If you're bleeding or bruised up, I can fix that, but beats me if I can put together a broken bone. Haven't tried that yet.
[there no need for a demonstration; she's sure that sharon believes her, but she reaches for the blonde's other hand regardless. when she has it, she leans down and lags her tongue briefly yet slowly along the back of her hand—then seals it with a kiss.
whether sharon had an ache on her hand or not (player's choice!), what happens next is all the same. she'll get this tingling sensation that'll spread from the spot she touched then down to her fingers—a feel that's hauntingly similar to sticking a hand down in lukewarm spa water while someone is giving it a gentle massage. pain or not, her hand will feel refreshed, and new, rearing to go to do... whatever a hand is meant to do.]
I'm like a walking and breathing antidote. Aaaand it's why I've been keeping it to myself. [jinx lets go and settles back onto her friend's chest.] — People can get so desperate for anything. If this gets out, they might... I don't know; torture me so I'll cry for them. Or. Lock me up in some basement where I sweat and dehydrate. Or worse! Force me to shove my tongue down their throats, get cured, and get a kiss outta me. Bleh.
[ Sharon had always just assumed Jinx was capable—stronger, faster, luckier than her. It made sense to her before, but now that she's brought it up... Sharon hadn't gotten through the month unscathed; Ash had tossed her around hard enough that she was still nursing the bruises. So when she finds out Jinx can actually heal herself, with her tears, or sweat, or saliva, her first reaction is a mix of awe and mild disgust. Still, she doesn't pull her hand back when Jinx leans down and gives it a wet lick, sealing it with a soft kiss.
The feeling that follows catches her completely off guard. A quiet sound slips from her throat before she can stop it. Her hand wasn't wounded, just stiff from overuse, and now, suddenly, it isn't. She stares for a moment, trying to process what just happened—what Jinx has said. Her worries. ]
The only person I can think of right away who might take advantage of that is Cooper. [ She says after a moment, voice dropping, though the thought makes her uneasy. The memory of what she did to him lingers like a bad taste. Could she ever turn that cruelty on Jinx? Use Isha that way? All it took was the thought of betrayal. She clears her throat, trying to shove the thought down. ]
But that's amazing, Jinx. [ The admiration in her voice is real, unguarded. The fact that she even trusted her with it feels good despite her worry. ] I won't tell anyone, promise. But—remember that tin of salve I have? The one that heals? [ The one she'd used on Jinx's hip. ] You might be able to make something like that. Mix your spit into a gel. You wouldn't even have to reveal how you made it.
[ A slow grin tugs at her lips. ] You could probably trade a tiny jar of that for anything you wanted—from anyone here.
[ she snorts before barking out a chuckle, not out of sarcasm or mockery, but a real one. somehow, jinx finds her suggestion humorous and she shakes her head against sharon's shirt over it. ]
Oh, brother. You sound exactly like one of my dads right now.
[ before she clarifies, the bluenette rolls her entire body onto her friend but then repositions herself to straddle her. she then straightens her spine while clasping her hands behind her back—mimicking her father, silco, as if he is about to distribute a lecture. ]
"Use your intellect, child. Observe what they desire, then give them what they crave."
[ Jinx rolls on top of her, shifting easily to straddle her hips. Not exactly cuddling, missy, but she lets it happen, propping herself up on her elbows with a flicker of amusement. The position feels familiar—another echo of their time tangled up in her blanket fort. ]
[she hums in agreement, her thoughts drifting off to him with such fondness, and reminiscing about the very last time she spent with him—silco carrying her bridal style as they traveled along the ocean, preaching about how she should bring this city to heel with her magic.
even though jinx didn't have the courage to tell him she wasn't interested, she was always amused by how simple it was for him to rule a society. to have that kind of glamour underneath his belt... he really is an astounding man.]
Mmm... he'd think you'd be bad for me though. Probably call you a "distraction" or "a bad influence." A good girl like me hanging around with the wrong crowd.
[ The memory ripples through their tether like a warm current, and Sharon leans into it. It's a good one, sweet, even, and she remembers Silco clearly from the banquet, imposing in his own peculiar way.
The suggestion that she's the bad influence draws a syrupy laugh from her. ] Puh-lease. If anything, I'm the opposite. I mean, I help keep the voices away, don't I? [ Her grin takes on a smug edge. ] But he's probably right about me being a distraction.
[ She can feel the truth of it. Jinx's emotions hum too close to ignore when they're together—the flickers of doubt, the confusion, the way something between them keeps sparking. Sharon isn't blind to it, not in the slightest. Just... unsure what to do with it. ]
[ 'and that's what makes you dangerous.' says a thought that breezes between them like a bird soaring through with no respect for anyone. because while silco relaxed her in so many ways, not even he could shoo the "others" away when they'd taunt her.
of course, her father wasn't an additional voice that rang in her head throughout her days, but... the twinkle between her and sharon is something so different from all of her loved ones. it's almost in a line with a certain boy savior who can fill her stomach with butterflies the exact same way. ]
Heh, yeah. He'd want me to stalk the entire city and give him all the intel. Who is the weakest parasite to the most threatening.
[a breath escape her lips, her shoulders going slump but relaxed—content.]
Buuuuut instead! Here I am.... doing this.
[ and it's not a bad this, it's a lovely this. a this she wants to have more often if she had things her way. ]
[ There are moments, like this one, when Sharon finds herself wondering about Jinx and Silco, catching the faint whiff of something off between them. A tilt in the balance she can't quite name. It sounds, in some ways, as if the older man used her, like Jinx was more a weapon in his arsenal than a daughter.
Sharon shifts, sitting up just enough to slip an arm around Jinx's waist and pull her back down against her chest. ]
You make it sound like this would be a waste of your time if he were here. [ Softly. The idea doesn't sit right with her. ] It's not like we do this all the time. [ Though truthfully, they've done it enough that it's started to feel easy—comfortable. ]
[ several emotions rattle in her heart at once. first, the flush prickling across her freckles when her arm coils around her waist—drawing her down to her chest. her cheek settles perfectly in the dip between her breasts, and she tries to position her hands in a way where it doesn't seem like she is groping her inappropriately. and then second, a rush of regret with how she worded herself. don't tell her that her "jinx" is around the corner again? ]
Wait, no. That's not what I... — [ a sigh leaves her chest, giving up on trying to justify herself as she burrows more into her friend. relax, try again. don't let the "jinx" take this moment away. ]
When it comes to you and... this? It'll never be a waste of time for me.
[ Sharon threads her fingers through Jinx's hair, starting at the root and working slowly through the length, careful not to tug. The motion is gentle, rhythmic. ]
For you, sure, but what if Silco showed up? [ There's no challenge in her tone, no spark meant to provoke, just quiet curiosity, a genuine question about what might shift between them if he appeared. ]
[ this whole time their thread had been buzzing, but at the question, jinx's side of it suddenly stills and grows silent. there's a great deal of hesitation overcasting their bond and them. and then silco's voice bulldozes and dominates all of her thoughts; sharon can hear him so lucidly too, it's as if he is haunting her bedroom—he's in the walls, her flooring, their air.
'it's only us.' 'you're the only one i can trust with this, jinx.' 'you're my daughter, i'll never forsake you.' 'i am your family, everyone else betrays us.' 'there is nothing about this place that is home except you.'
her heart aches, and sharon can feel the desire to hold, to soothe, to cradle silco's face from jinx regardless of whether he is just a voice. but hearing it all again makes her want to sprint into the fire to save him just so he wouldn't have to deal with the torment of loneliness. ]
... I'll have a talk with him. Tell him that no matter what or who I let in, he will always be my number one man. I won't abandon him just because I like you and I want you around.
[ Her hand lingers in Jinx's hair as Silco's voice rattles through her mind, each echo dripping with manipulation—as if he worked hard to nail in that he's the only one Jinx could, or should, ever need. Her stomach twists, doubt and unease tangling along the tether between them. ]
And if he continues to disapprove? [ She might not have asked before, but having met him in the dream changes things—he could show up, and then what? She resumes smoothing Jinx's hair, soft and steady. ] I'm not really worried if he does, but... I'd rather our friendship not cause issues.
[ again, there is silence, and she knows being this hesitant isn't doing wonders for the unease that's swirling on their tether. but jinx finally reaches to soothe it, to blanket it with warmth, and clinginess—not the possessive kind (this time), but the type where someone will have to do some real damage in order make her not see sharon anymore. ]
Silco wants me happy, and he won't do things that'll make me upset. He's... broken. Like I am. He's hurting a lot inside... so he thinks differently. He just needs people to like him and love him like I do. Accept him for who he is.
[ The silence doesn't bother Sharon. When Jinx blankets the tether between them with that mix of warmth and clinginess, Sharon's smile softens—tight but genuine, her appreciation echoing faintly. It isn't a pleasant topic, and it's definitely heavier than what Jinx probably wanted to deal with tonight, but maybe it's for the best.
She calls Silco broken—calls herself broken. Hurt people hurt people. Sharon knows that all too well. ] Ah, so I'm gonna have to win him over, huh? Classic romcom setup. [ Her tone lightens, and she gives Jinx a gentle nudge, coaxing her to look up. ]
You're not broken, by the way. Or at least, that's not how I see you.
[ she's... not sure what she means by a "romcom setup," or maybe she does but doesn't understand the abbreviation. but that becomes unimportant when sharon mentions her perspective on her, and once again, jinx gapes at her—words dying in her throat for the millionth time, it feels.
the bluenette focuses on her face, searching for any wrinkles or twitch of something that could tell her she is only saying so to boost her confidence, because it's the "right thing to say" in a moment like this. but when she comes empty-handed and see that sharon isn't telling her just because she is being kind, that familiar blush returns for an encore. ]
How... do... you see me?
[ the question sprints past her before she could tug it back, suddenly now nervous about what the answer is going to be. if she doesn't see her broken, then what? a lunatic? that's usually the next step. and with how she behaved during the abandon apartment with all the broken glass, sharon must see her as some individual who needs to be tucked away in cell and away from society. .... right? ]
[ The question gives her pause, expression pinching as she searches for the right way to explain it. ] I just see... you. [ It lands flat even to her own ears, and she rolls her eyes, letting out a slow breath. ]
Yeah, you're a little messed up, but everyone here is. You've got ghosts rattling around in your head, and trust me, I wonder what's going on in there sometimes— [ she adds, softer, almost teasing, ] —but that doesn't make you broken. It just means you've been through too much—way more than someone your age should have.
[ Trauma stacks up. Sharon knows that better than most. She twines a strand of Jinx's hair around her finger, gentle. ] But past all that? You're smart. Weird in a good way. Creative. Even if you were broken, everything else about you more than balances the scales.
[ everything in her stiffens: her muscles and her soul, and for a moment, she completely forgets how to breathe. and jinx wouldn't be surprised if sharon could hear her heart thumping beyond her chest and ears. but as she clarifies, the bluenette parts her lips to let her lungs release the air she's been holding—slow and steady. it's an answer she wasn't expecting, and ogling at her friend's face as she speaks is slowly making her dizzy and light-headed from feeling something she isn't quite used to yet.
so she concentrates on her lips instead; it's somehow becoming more of a magnetic pull for her as her eyes faintly mist into tears. jinx doesn't know why exactly, maybe because her words are just that sweet and it's putting some sting in her eyelids. but when her lips stop moving, and they sit there still and awaiting her response, jinx inches closer—her heart leaping to her ears now to scream its pulsating song.
her eyes dance between those lips and sharon's blues, afraid to push more, but gravity seems to override everything. what's the worst that can happen? she turns away, pushes her, and tells her to get out or this shouldn't be in this reality but in the other. she should say something, right? ]
[ There is no missing the way Jinx's focus drifts, and Sharon isn't nearly oblivious enough to pretend she doesn't understand what she's inviting. Even with tears wetting her eyes, Jinx keeps flicking her gaze to Sharon's lips. It sends Sharon's heartbeat knocking too hard, her pulse humming in her ears, a jittery mix of nerves and anticipation tightening her chest.
She wets her lips, catching the lower one lightly between her teeth for a breath before leaning in, a little clumsy, to brush their mouths together. This time she doesn't pull back quickly; unlike their first fleeting kiss, Sharon lets this one stretch out, warm and slow. After all, what's the worst that can happen? ]
[ there's an extremely delicate jerk from jinx when their lips touch; it somehow caught her by surprise despite the foresight. and when she notices that this kiss is not at all like their first, that there's something tender and smooth (well, as smooth as clumsiness can get) about it, it's like, almost in an instant, all of her stress, worries, and low self-esteem thaw off her muscles and submerge onto the mattress—the foam absorbing it as if it's one giant sponge.
jinx leans into the kiss just a smidge, not too hard, but deep enough to emphasize that this, this little moment right here, is something she won't protest about if it decides to cross their path again in the future. it's a silent way of her offering a proposition.
with their situation being so horrid and filled with so much ache, if sharon wants to feel nice for a change, to feel at peace, or to forget what's going on outside their walls, their kiss can be her or their little escape. and as their kiss continues to linger, jinx's lock drifts unnaturally again with no wind or being underneath the sea—except now it's shining. their tether is matching the gleam of her hair, the thread thickening and glossy with affection, care, and loyalty. her hand inches to cup her cheek, and jinx parts her lips to only lap her tongue across sharon's lower lip briefly before sealing them for another closed kiss.
it's another future offer (if she is translating what she is saying well enough). that if she is hurting anywhere, physically—she's okay with exchanging a kiss as an antidote. and speaking of, there might be some extra tingling sensation between their lips now thanks to that. ]
[ Sharon leans into Jinx's palm, welcoming the touch, letting the kiss deepen until it's wet and tingling—strange in its intensity, electric and foreign, but so deeply wanted that if she were thinking at all, she might've scared herself with it.
The slow drag of Jinx's tongue against her lower lip feels like an invitation, and Sharon answers with her own, nudging softly, coaxing Jinx's lips apart so she can slip in with a hunger that grows with every stolen breath. Her thoughts move thick and sluggish, like cold molasses, barely registering the way Jinx's hair has begun to float on its own, or how that faint blue glow catches at the edge of her vision.
It makes the moment feel like magic.
Their tether hums with want, with ache, and Sharon leans into it, sliding an arm around Jinx's narrow waist to draw her closer, unwilling to let space form between them. The warmth pooling low in her belly pushes aside any shame or hesitation that might've once made her pull back.
She's familiar with wanting—she's never been good at giving in to it. But as she does, the air fills with the scent of a warm, woody vanilla, rich and sweet. ]
[ jinx had heard many stories in her youth about kissing. like how your first kiss is something special and you should be careful with who you select. but some other stories have said that your first kiss isn't important, but you'll know if it's the right one because you'll feel like you're floating or you'll experience fireworks.
as a child, jinx thought all of these myths were full of boloney, because how can mashing lips together make you feel anything? but once she gets seduced to part her lips and their tongues begin to waltz together, her heart suddenly swells and the world swirls around her.
it feels as if the two of them are sinking through the mattress, past the foam and springs, to descend steadily into the abyss of... not darkness, in essence, but a private realm where no one could find them or hurt them—where jinx can be selfish and have sharon to herself for a little while, or for however long she is allowing her to have her.
when she gets tugged close, her body shifts and presses onto her friend's, and her free hand grips tight onto the fabric of her top. her tongue swirls more with hers, and she embraces their tether to reveal the same want. there's a hint of desire there too, to be her close friend, to be the one who she'll do... this to, and if she ever wants to push through this first door and scale up the stairs to the next one, she'll be willing to explore with her. there's a thick of wanting to take care of her, to protect her, to make her happy, smile, and fulfill all of her wishes—whenever she's ready, to just say the word.
jinx breaks their kiss, but only for a millisecond to breathe, to take in the lovely sweet aroma before sinking right back on her lips. is kissing meant to be intoxicating? so bewitching? maybe that's why kalmiya and others have been doing what they've been doing. it all feels too lovely to quit. ]
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[except jinx is the one with heat flooding her cheeks and ears as she buries her face a little deeper in her friend's chest. but there's a smile on her, despite pressing on her lower lip with her teeth to suppress it. jinx doesn't let that comment linger for too long as she shifts her head just a touch to no longer shield her blush.]
Hey, uhm. ... I just wanted to say, "Thank you." For, I dunno, being with me. Besides my old man and my kid, this is the longest anyone chose to stay. And... you've been a great help to me. I—I know I don't always... show it. I suck at that, eh heh heh. But... the voices back off more when you're around. I think you've got them scared.
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It isn't needed, but the appreciation hums through their tether all the same. They're standing in the same place, in more ways than one, learning how to live with people who actually care. It's strange and new for both of them, a shared kind of growing pain. ]
As they should be. [ Said with quiet conviction as she reaches down to brush Jinx's bangs from her eyes. ] Everyone should be scared of me—especially if they hurt people I care about.
[ Those tormenting voices might just be shards of Jinx's own mind, but that wouldn't stop Sharon from wanting to stop them all the same. ]
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sharon might notice a change in jinx's expression, her cheeks appearing fuller for some reason and her eyes becoming large and doe-like. maybe it's just a trick of the eye, or maybe there are two sides of her, and she doesn't let this one out enough. whatever is happening, the bluenette keeps quiet as the blonde speaks—her stare swapping from her blues to her lips.]
... Yeah.
[the word finally spills: hyperfocusing more between her two targets than she needs to. reality and the dreamscape are two "different reals"—something that sharon had said to her, and jinx finds herself wondering at night if moments like this...like their kiss, for example, are only meant to stay in the "other reality". it probably would be for the best to not let that cross over, and yet... she catches herself ogling at them when she shouldn't.
sometimes, she wants to ask her friend if she thinks back on that dream, the good part of it, but she's too afraid of what the answer would be, too nervous to face any kind of rejection, embarrassment, or ache. some things are better left unsaid, they say, and this... this might be one of those things. still, her hand grips softly on the fabric of her friend's attire without her permission, and the lump in her throat is swelling even when she hadn't eaten anything that would cause her to choke. ]
I have a secret. It's something I've learned about myself and my powers, something that I can do. And I've been keeping it to myself because... I felt people would take advantage of me if they knew somehow. But. I wanna tell you what it is; I want you to know about it.
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When Jinx's fingers catch the fabric of her soft, paint-stained pajama shirt, Sharon can't help but wonder what's coming, what question might spill out next. But instead, the other girl starts talking about a secret. About something people might use against her. She straightens, just a little, without breaking contact. It's a subtle shift, but her attention sharpens. She knows Jinx's power, knows how precious water is here, but what could anyone really take from her?
Part of her wants to ask why. Why tell her this? With the way Sundowning has been eating at her, trust doesn't seem like a wise gamble. But what she says instead is a soft, careful, and painfully curious: ] What is it?
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Has it ever crossed your mind how I've made it here after busting up some creatures without a scratch on me?
[because that's pretty strange, isn't it? how she spent an hour doing whatever with the hosts and arrived here unscathed. in fact, that's been happening quite a lot with her. a sheepish smile flings her friend's way before clearing her throat.]
Ahem, well. Uh... that's because I heal myself. And people, too. With my tears, my sweat, saliva, or just about anything wet regarding me.
If you're feeling under the weather, poisoned, or have a crick in your neck, I can get rid of it. If you're bleeding or bruised up, I can fix that, but beats me if I can put together a broken bone. Haven't tried that yet.
[there no need for a demonstration; she's sure that sharon believes her, but she reaches for the blonde's other hand regardless. when she has it, she leans down and lags her tongue briefly yet slowly along the back of her hand—then seals it with a kiss.
whether sharon had an ache on her hand or not (player's choice!), what happens next is all the same. she'll get this tingling sensation that'll spread from the spot she touched then down to her fingers—a feel that's hauntingly similar to sticking a hand down in lukewarm spa water while someone is giving it a gentle massage. pain or not, her hand will feel refreshed, and new, rearing to go to do... whatever a hand is meant to do.]
I'm like a walking and breathing antidote. Aaaand it's why I've been keeping it to myself. [jinx lets go and settles back onto her friend's chest.] — People can get so desperate for anything. If this gets out, they might... I don't know; torture me so I'll cry for them. Or. Lock me up in some basement where I sweat and dehydrate. Or worse! Force me to shove my tongue down their throats, get cured, and get a kiss outta me. Bleh.
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The feeling that follows catches her completely off guard. A quiet sound slips from her throat before she can stop it. Her hand wasn't wounded, just stiff from overuse, and now, suddenly, it isn't. She stares for a moment, trying to process what just happened—what Jinx has said. Her worries. ]
The only person I can think of right away who might take advantage of that is Cooper. [ She says after a moment, voice dropping, though the thought makes her uneasy. The memory of what she did to him lingers like a bad taste. Could she ever turn that cruelty on Jinx? Use Isha that way? All it took was the thought of betrayal. She clears her throat, trying to shove the thought down. ]
But that's amazing, Jinx. [ The admiration in her voice is real, unguarded. The fact that she even trusted her with it feels good despite her worry. ] I won't tell anyone, promise. But—remember that tin of salve I have? The one that heals? [ The one she'd used on Jinx's hip. ] You might be able to make something like that. Mix your spit into a gel. You wouldn't even have to reveal how you made it.
[ A slow grin tugs at her lips. ] You could probably trade a tiny jar of that for anything you wanted—from anyone here.
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Oh, brother. You sound exactly like one of my dads right now.
[ before she clarifies, the bluenette rolls her entire body onto her friend but then repositions herself to straddle her. she then straightens her spine while clasping her hands behind her back—mimicking her father, silco, as if he is about to distribute a lecture. ]
"Use your intellect, child. Observe what they desire, then give them what they crave."
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Guess that means great minds think alike, huh?
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even though jinx didn't have the courage to tell him she wasn't interested, she was always amused by how simple it was for him to rule a society. to have that kind of glamour underneath his belt... he really is an astounding man.]
Mmm... he'd think you'd be bad for me though. Probably call you a "distraction" or "a bad influence." A good girl like me hanging around with the wrong crowd.
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The suggestion that she's the bad influence draws a syrupy laugh from her. ] Puh-lease. If anything, I'm the opposite. I mean, I help keep the voices away, don't I? [ Her grin takes on a smug edge. ] But he's probably right about me being a distraction.
[ She can feel the truth of it. Jinx's emotions hum too close to ignore when they're together—the flickers of doubt, the confusion, the way something between them keeps sparking. Sharon isn't blind to it, not in the slightest. Just... unsure what to do with it. ]
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of course, her father wasn't an additional voice that rang in her head throughout her days, but... the twinkle between her and sharon is something so different from all of her loved ones. it's almost in a line with a certain boy savior who can fill her stomach with butterflies the exact same way. ]
Heh, yeah. He'd want me to stalk the entire city and give him all the intel. Who is the weakest parasite to the most threatening.
[a breath escape her lips, her shoulders going slump but relaxed—content.]
Buuuuut instead! Here I am.... doing this.
[ and it's not a bad this, it's a lovely this. a this she wants to have more often if she had things her way. ]
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Sharon shifts, sitting up just enough to slip an arm around Jinx's waist and pull her back down against her chest. ]
You make it sound like this would be a waste of your time if he were here. [ Softly. The idea doesn't sit right with her. ] It's not like we do this all the time. [ Though truthfully, they've done it enough that it's started to feel easy—comfortable. ]
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Wait, no. That's not what I... — [ a sigh leaves her chest, giving up on trying to justify herself as she burrows more into her friend. relax, try again. don't let the "jinx" take this moment away. ]
When it comes to you and... this? It'll never be a waste of time for me.
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For you, sure, but what if Silco showed up? [ There's no challenge in her tone, no spark meant to provoke, just quiet curiosity, a genuine question about what might shift between them if he appeared. ]
laptop, please work with me here.
'it's only us.'
'you're the only one i can trust with this, jinx.'
'you're my daughter, i'll never forsake you.'
'i am your family, everyone else betrays us.'
'there is nothing about this place that is home except you.'
her heart aches, and sharon can feel the desire to hold, to soothe, to cradle silco's face from jinx regardless of whether he is just a voice. but hearing it all again makes her want to sprint into the fire to save him just so he wouldn't have to deal with the torment of loneliness. ]
... I'll have a talk with him. Tell him that no matter what or who I let in, he will always be my number one man. I won't abandon him just because I like you and I want you around.
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And if he continues to disapprove? [ She might not have asked before, but having met him in the dream changes things—he could show up, and then what? She resumes smoothing Jinx's hair, soft and steady. ] I'm not really worried if he does, but... I'd rather our friendship not cause issues.
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Silco wants me happy, and he won't do things that'll make me upset. He's... broken. Like I am. He's hurting a lot inside... so he thinks differently. He just needs people to like him and love him like I do. Accept him for who he is.
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She calls Silco broken—calls herself broken. Hurt people hurt people. Sharon knows that all too well. ] Ah, so I'm gonna have to win him over, huh? Classic romcom setup. [ Her tone lightens, and she gives Jinx a gentle nudge, coaxing her to look up. ]
You're not broken, by the way. Or at least, that's not how I see you.
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the bluenette focuses on her face, searching for any wrinkles or twitch of something that could tell her she is only saying so to boost her confidence, because it's the "right thing to say" in a moment like this. but when she comes empty-handed and see that sharon isn't telling her just because she is being kind, that familiar blush returns for an encore. ]
How... do... you see me?
[ the question sprints past her before she could tug it back, suddenly now nervous about what the answer is going to be. if she doesn't see her broken, then what? a lunatic? that's usually the next step. and with how she behaved during the abandon apartment with all the broken glass, sharon must see her as some individual who needs to be tucked away in cell and away from society. .... right? ]
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Yeah, you're a little messed up, but everyone here is. You've got ghosts rattling around in your head, and trust me, I wonder what's going on in there sometimes— [ she adds, softer, almost teasing, ] —but that doesn't make you broken. It just means you've been through too much—way more than someone your age should have.
[ Trauma stacks up. Sharon knows that better than most. She twines a strand of Jinx's hair around her finger, gentle. ] But past all that? You're smart. Weird in a good way. Creative. Even if you were broken, everything else about you more than balances the scales.
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so she concentrates on her lips instead; it's somehow becoming more of a magnetic pull for her as her eyes faintly mist into tears. jinx doesn't know why exactly, maybe because her words are just that sweet and it's putting some sting in her eyelids. but when her lips stop moving, and they sit there still and awaiting her response, jinx inches closer—her heart leaping to her ears now to scream its pulsating song.
her eyes dance between those lips and sharon's blues, afraid to push more, but gravity seems to override everything. what's the worst that can happen? she turns away, pushes her, and tells her to get out or this shouldn't be in this reality but in the other. she should say something, right? ]
... I.
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She wets her lips, catching the lower one lightly between her teeth for a breath before leaning in, a little clumsy, to brush their mouths together. This time she doesn't pull back quickly; unlike their first fleeting kiss, Sharon lets this one stretch out, warm and slow. After all, what's the worst that can happen? ]
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jinx leans into the kiss just a smidge, not too hard, but deep enough to emphasize that this, this little moment right here, is something she won't protest about if it decides to cross their path again in the future. it's a silent way of her offering a proposition.
with their situation being so horrid and filled with so much ache, if sharon wants to feel nice for a change, to feel at peace, or to forget what's going on outside their walls, their kiss can be her or their little escape. and as their kiss continues to linger, jinx's lock drifts unnaturally again with no wind or being underneath the sea—except now it's shining. their tether is matching the gleam of her hair, the thread thickening and glossy with affection, care, and loyalty. her hand inches to cup her cheek, and jinx parts her lips to only lap her tongue across sharon's lower lip briefly before sealing them for another closed kiss.
it's another future offer (if she is translating what she is saying well enough). that if she is hurting anywhere, physically—she's okay with exchanging a kiss as an antidote. and speaking of, there might be some extra tingling sensation between their lips now thanks to that. ]
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The slow drag of Jinx's tongue against her lower lip feels like an invitation, and Sharon answers with her own, nudging softly, coaxing Jinx's lips apart so she can slip in with a hunger that grows with every stolen breath. Her thoughts move thick and sluggish, like cold molasses, barely registering the way Jinx's hair has begun to float on its own, or how that faint blue glow catches at the edge of her vision.
It makes the moment feel like magic.
Their tether hums with want, with ache, and Sharon leans into it, sliding an arm around Jinx's narrow waist to draw her closer, unwilling to let space form between them. The warmth pooling low in her belly pushes aside any shame or hesitation that might've once made her pull back.
She's familiar with wanting—she's never been good at giving in to it. But as she does, the air fills with the scent of a warm, woody vanilla, rich and sweet. ]
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as a child, jinx thought all of these myths were full of boloney, because how can mashing lips together make you feel anything? but once she gets seduced to part her lips and their tongues begin to waltz together, her heart suddenly swells and the world swirls around her.
it feels as if the two of them are sinking through the mattress, past the foam and springs, to descend steadily into the abyss of... not darkness, in essence, but a private realm where no one could find them or hurt them—where jinx can be selfish and have sharon to herself for a little while, or for however long she is allowing her to have her.
when she gets tugged close, her body shifts and presses onto her friend's, and her free hand grips tight onto the fabric of her top. her tongue swirls more with hers, and she embraces their tether to reveal the same want. there's a hint of desire there too, to be her close friend, to be the one who she'll do... this to, and if she ever wants to push through this first door and scale up the stairs to the next one, she'll be willing to explore with her. there's a thick of wanting to take care of her, to protect her, to make her happy, smile, and fulfill all of her wishes—whenever she's ready, to just say the word.
jinx breaks their kiss, but only for a millisecond to breathe, to take in the lovely sweet aroma before sinking right back on her lips. is kissing meant to be intoxicating? so bewitching? maybe that's why kalmiya and others have been doing what they've been doing. it all feels too lovely to quit. ]
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cw: nsfw blunt silliness
cw: very mild ref to sa
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1/2
2/2 cw: schizophrenia
cw: schizophrenia
cw: schizophrenia
cw: schizophrenia
cw: schizophrenia
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