[ 'and that's what makes you dangerous.' says a thought that breezes between them like a bird soaring through with no respect for anyone. because while silco relaxed her in so many ways, not even he could shoo the "others" away when they'd taunt her.
of course, her father wasn't an additional voice that rang in her head throughout her days, but... the twinkle between her and sharon is something so different from all of her loved ones. it's almost in a line with a certain boy savior who can fill her stomach with butterflies the exact same way. ]
Heh, yeah. He'd want me to stalk the entire city and give him all the intel. Who is the weakest parasite to the most threatening.
[a breath escape her lips, her shoulders going slump but relaxed—content.]
Buuuuut instead! Here I am.... doing this.
[ and it's not a bad this, it's a lovely this. a this she wants to have more often if she had things her way. ]
[ There are moments, like this one, when Sharon finds herself wondering about Jinx and Silco, catching the faint whiff of something off between them. A tilt in the balance she can't quite name. It sounds, in some ways, as if the older man used her, like Jinx was more a weapon in his arsenal than a daughter.
Sharon shifts, sitting up just enough to slip an arm around Jinx's waist and pull her back down against her chest. ]
You make it sound like this would be a waste of your time if he were here. [ Softly. The idea doesn't sit right with her. ] It's not like we do this all the time. [ Though truthfully, they've done it enough that it's started to feel easy—comfortable. ]
[ several emotions rattle in her heart at once. first, the flush prickling across her freckles when her arm coils around her waist—drawing her down to her chest. her cheek settles perfectly in the dip between her breasts, and she tries to position her hands in a way where it doesn't seem like she is groping her inappropriately. and then second, a rush of regret with how she worded herself. don't tell her that her "jinx" is around the corner again? ]
Wait, no. That's not what I... — [ a sigh leaves her chest, giving up on trying to justify herself as she burrows more into her friend. relax, try again. don't let the "jinx" take this moment away. ]
When it comes to you and... this? It'll never be a waste of time for me.
[ Sharon threads her fingers through Jinx's hair, starting at the root and working slowly through the length, careful not to tug. The motion is gentle, rhythmic. ]
For you, sure, but what if Silco showed up? [ There's no challenge in her tone, no spark meant to provoke, just quiet curiosity, a genuine question about what might shift between them if he appeared. ]
[ this whole time their thread had been buzzing, but at the question, jinx's side of it suddenly stills and grows silent. there's a great deal of hesitation overcasting their bond and them. and then silco's voice bulldozes and dominates all of her thoughts; sharon can hear him so lucidly too, it's as if he is haunting her bedroom—he's in the walls, her flooring, their air.
'it's only us.' 'you're the only one i can trust with this, jinx.' 'you're my daughter, i'll never forsake you.' 'i am your family, everyone else betrays us.' 'there is nothing about this place that is home except you.'
her heart aches, and sharon can feel the desire to hold, to soothe, to cradle silco's face from jinx regardless of whether he is just a voice. but hearing it all again makes her want to sprint into the fire to save him just so he wouldn't have to deal with the torment of loneliness. ]
... I'll have a talk with him. Tell him that no matter what or who I let in, he will always be my number one man. I won't abandon him just because I like you and I want you around.
[ Her hand lingers in Jinx's hair as Silco's voice rattles through her mind, each echo dripping with manipulation—as if he worked hard to nail in that he's the only one Jinx could, or should, ever need. Her stomach twists, doubt and unease tangling along the tether between them. ]
And if he continues to disapprove? [ She might not have asked before, but having met him in the dream changes things—he could show up, and then what? She resumes smoothing Jinx's hair, soft and steady. ] I'm not really worried if he does, but... I'd rather our friendship not cause issues.
[ again, there is silence, and she knows being this hesitant isn't doing wonders for the unease that's swirling on their tether. but jinx finally reaches to soothe it, to blanket it with warmth, and clinginess—not the possessive kind (this time), but the type where someone will have to do some real damage in order make her not see sharon anymore. ]
Silco wants me happy, and he won't do things that'll make me upset. He's... broken. Like I am. He's hurting a lot inside... so he thinks differently. He just needs people to like him and love him like I do. Accept him for who he is.
[ The silence doesn't bother Sharon. When Jinx blankets the tether between them with that mix of warmth and clinginess, Sharon's smile softens—tight but genuine, her appreciation echoing faintly. It isn't a pleasant topic, and it's definitely heavier than what Jinx probably wanted to deal with tonight, but maybe it's for the best.
She calls Silco broken—calls herself broken. Hurt people hurt people. Sharon knows that all too well. ] Ah, so I'm gonna have to win him over, huh? Classic romcom setup. [ Her tone lightens, and she gives Jinx a gentle nudge, coaxing her to look up. ]
You're not broken, by the way. Or at least, that's not how I see you.
[ she's... not sure what she means by a "romcom setup," or maybe she does but doesn't understand the abbreviation. but that becomes unimportant when sharon mentions her perspective on her, and once again, jinx gapes at her—words dying in her throat for the millionth time, it feels.
the bluenette focuses on her face, searching for any wrinkles or twitch of something that could tell her she is only saying so to boost her confidence, because it's the "right thing to say" in a moment like this. but when she comes empty-handed and see that sharon isn't telling her just because she is being kind, that familiar blush returns for an encore. ]
How... do... you see me?
[ the question sprints past her before she could tug it back, suddenly now nervous about what the answer is going to be. if she doesn't see her broken, then what? a lunatic? that's usually the next step. and with how she behaved during the abandon apartment with all the broken glass, sharon must see her as some individual who needs to be tucked away in cell and away from society. .... right? ]
[ The question gives her pause, expression pinching as she searches for the right way to explain it. ] I just see... you. [ It lands flat even to her own ears, and she rolls her eyes, letting out a slow breath. ]
Yeah, you're a little messed up, but everyone here is. You've got ghosts rattling around in your head, and trust me, I wonder what's going on in there sometimes— [ she adds, softer, almost teasing, ] —but that doesn't make you broken. It just means you've been through too much—way more than someone your age should have.
[ Trauma stacks up. Sharon knows that better than most. She twines a strand of Jinx's hair around her finger, gentle. ] But past all that? You're smart. Weird in a good way. Creative. Even if you were broken, everything else about you more than balances the scales.
[ everything in her stiffens: her muscles and her soul, and for a moment, she completely forgets how to breathe. and jinx wouldn't be surprised if sharon could hear her heart thumping beyond her chest and ears. but as she clarifies, the bluenette parts her lips to let her lungs release the air she's been holding—slow and steady. it's an answer she wasn't expecting, and ogling at her friend's face as she speaks is slowly making her dizzy and light-headed from feeling something she isn't quite used to yet.
so she concentrates on her lips instead; it's somehow becoming more of a magnetic pull for her as her eyes faintly mist into tears. jinx doesn't know why exactly, maybe because her words are just that sweet and it's putting some sting in her eyelids. but when her lips stop moving, and they sit there still and awaiting her response, jinx inches closer—her heart leaping to her ears now to scream its pulsating song.
her eyes dance between those lips and sharon's blues, afraid to push more, but gravity seems to override everything. what's the worst that can happen? she turns away, pushes her, and tells her to get out or this shouldn't be in this reality but in the other. she should say something, right? ]
[ There is no missing the way Jinx's focus drifts, and Sharon isn't nearly oblivious enough to pretend she doesn't understand what she's inviting. Even with tears wetting her eyes, Jinx keeps flicking her gaze to Sharon's lips. It sends Sharon's heartbeat knocking too hard, her pulse humming in her ears, a jittery mix of nerves and anticipation tightening her chest.
She wets her lips, catching the lower one lightly between her teeth for a breath before leaning in, a little clumsy, to brush their mouths together. This time she doesn't pull back quickly; unlike their first fleeting kiss, Sharon lets this one stretch out, warm and slow. After all, what's the worst that can happen? ]
[ there's an extremely delicate jerk from jinx when their lips touch; it somehow caught her by surprise despite the foresight. and when she notices that this kiss is not at all like their first, that there's something tender and smooth (well, as smooth as clumsiness can get) about it, it's like, almost in an instant, all of her stress, worries, and low self-esteem thaw off her muscles and submerge onto the mattress—the foam absorbing it as if it's one giant sponge.
jinx leans into the kiss just a smidge, not too hard, but deep enough to emphasize that this, this little moment right here, is something she won't protest about if it decides to cross their path again in the future. it's a silent way of her offering a proposition.
with their situation being so horrid and filled with so much ache, if sharon wants to feel nice for a change, to feel at peace, or to forget what's going on outside their walls, their kiss can be her or their little escape. and as their kiss continues to linger, jinx's lock drifts unnaturally again with no wind or being underneath the sea—except now it's shining. their tether is matching the gleam of her hair, the thread thickening and glossy with affection, care, and loyalty. her hand inches to cup her cheek, and jinx parts her lips to only lap her tongue across sharon's lower lip briefly before sealing them for another closed kiss.
it's another future offer (if she is translating what she is saying well enough). that if she is hurting anywhere, physically—she's okay with exchanging a kiss as an antidote. and speaking of, there might be some extra tingling sensation between their lips now thanks to that. ]
[ Sharon leans into Jinx's palm, welcoming the touch, letting the kiss deepen until it's wet and tingling—strange in its intensity, electric and foreign, but so deeply wanted that if she were thinking at all, she might've scared herself with it.
The slow drag of Jinx's tongue against her lower lip feels like an invitation, and Sharon answers with her own, nudging softly, coaxing Jinx's lips apart so she can slip in with a hunger that grows with every stolen breath. Her thoughts move thick and sluggish, like cold molasses, barely registering the way Jinx's hair has begun to float on its own, or how that faint blue glow catches at the edge of her vision.
It makes the moment feel like magic.
Their tether hums with want, with ache, and Sharon leans into it, sliding an arm around Jinx's narrow waist to draw her closer, unwilling to let space form between them. The warmth pooling low in her belly pushes aside any shame or hesitation that might've once made her pull back.
She's familiar with wanting—she's never been good at giving in to it. But as she does, the air fills with the scent of a warm, woody vanilla, rich and sweet. ]
[ jinx had heard many stories in her youth about kissing. like how your first kiss is something special and you should be careful with who you select. but some other stories have said that your first kiss isn't important, but you'll know if it's the right one because you'll feel like you're floating or you'll experience fireworks.
as a child, jinx thought all of these myths were full of boloney, because how can mashing lips together make you feel anything? but once she gets seduced to part her lips and their tongues begin to waltz together, her heart suddenly swells and the world swirls around her.
it feels as if the two of them are sinking through the mattress, past the foam and springs, to descend steadily into the abyss of... not darkness, in essence, but a private realm where no one could find them or hurt them—where jinx can be selfish and have sharon to herself for a little while, or for however long she is allowing her to have her.
when she gets tugged close, her body shifts and presses onto her friend's, and her free hand grips tight onto the fabric of her top. her tongue swirls more with hers, and she embraces their tether to reveal the same want. there's a hint of desire there too, to be her close friend, to be the one who she'll do... this to, and if she ever wants to push through this first door and scale up the stairs to the next one, she'll be willing to explore with her. there's a thick of wanting to take care of her, to protect her, to make her happy, smile, and fulfill all of her wishes—whenever she's ready, to just say the word.
jinx breaks their kiss, but only for a millisecond to breathe, to take in the lovely sweet aroma before sinking right back on her lips. is kissing meant to be intoxicating? so bewitching? maybe that's why kalmiya and others have been doing what they've been doing. it all feels too lovely to quit. ]
[ Sharon has never had much interest in sex or dating or romance. Sure, there'd been moments where she'd felt a stab of envy listening to girls talk about crushes or weekend dates, but even then she knew it was just a longing to be normal—to be like them, to have those everyday girlhood experiences.
A million more thoughts race through her mind as the kiss deepens, yet the more Jinx leans in, the faster those thoughts blink out, like someone killing the lights one by one, until there's only this: them, pressed together, embracing in more ways than one. Breathing becomes an afterthought.
Hell, everything becomes an afterthought.
As they sink further into the pile of blankets, Sharon shifts, bringing her free hand up to thread her fingers through Jinx's blue hair. Their tether hums with pure want—a starving kind of need she didn't know she could possess. This closeness is intoxicating, almost unreal, and she has no desire whatsoever for it to stop. Maybe it just feels good to feel wanted. ]
Is this what you [ she whispers against her lips between each sloppy, needy kiss ] expected when you came over?
[ she almost didn't catch her speaking; her mind is being whiplashed in so many different directions that she's becoming disoriented. but it's the kind of the dizzy that jinx finds herself not minding, because sharon is here and her hold on her is strong and affectionate. ]
No. [ the crow coos back, stealing a few more feverish kisses from her before saying more. ] But I don't wanna quit. Do you?
[ sure, they'll have to stop kissing sometime, but she prods how she feels through their tether—how she doesn't want this to be like their first, where they kissed once and then never spoke of it again or did it ever again until now.
she's not sure what this means for their friendship, if it will make things more complicated, or if they'll just be two people who shove their tongues down their throats from time to time. all she knows right now is being intimate with sharon feels nice, making her feel desirable and cared for, and vice versa feels nice. and she doesn't want any of this to stop or go away—it's all too comfortable. ]
Not really. [ she admits huskily, even as she simultaneously ignores the warm, insistent pulse building between her thighs—a familiar ache she recognizes all too well. She knows her body's signals, knows exactly what they're urging her toward, but she tucks that rising want away even as it spreads through her like heat.
Touching Jinx is its own kind of pleasure. She's all sharp angles and wiry strength, hip bones brushing beneath Sharon's palm, but her skin is soft and slick in that strange way Sharon has grown used to. It yields under her fingertips, inviting and warm. ]
But we probably should soon. It's, uh... [ She eases back a little with a breathy laugh, face flushed, lips shining from their kiss. ] It's kinda weird to go full hot and heavy with Arthur and Freddie still in the house.
[ There's more she wants, but that thought alone sends a fluttering rush through her stomach, a nervous excitement she isn't used to. Not even stepping into a new identity for the first time ever felt like this. This is something else entirely. ]
[ when sharon subsides just a bit, she bites her bottom lip to suppress her whine even though her eyes are doe-like and she is giving her that puppy dog look. she gets it, honestly and truly, but her hormones are begging for jinx to stand firm and shout in protest. the crow creeps in to close the gap her friend created, except she aims for her ear this time than her lips. ]
Then... [ she starts, planting a quick and tiny kiss to her earlobe. ] — What about visiting me...i-in my head? Later. Tonight. When everyone's asleep? Just for a little while?
[ if physically is a no-go because of nerves and the embarrassment of getting caught in the act, then why not use their tether to their advantage? when her lips jerk away from her ear, her thoughts rush through before she can say the words herself. ]
'I want to be your best friend. I want you to know that I really mean it.'
[ A shiver races down her spine when Jinx's lips brush her earlobe, her answering smile breaking on a soft, breathy giggle that ghosts along the other girl's neck. It's teasing, tantalizing—a tickle of temptation that almost makes her want to say fuck it. ] I could do that. [ And she means it, even if some distant, cautious part of her knows their connection has one massive flaw: Sleep. Everything funnels through the Murmur, even the tethers knitting them together. But clarity isn't exactly winning right now.
Then Jinx's thoughts slip into her mind, a featherlight whisper that makes her scalp tingle. Sharon turns, studying her, blue eyes locked on pink. ] Don't worry. I don't doubt it.
[ Best friend. Best friend. The weight of the modifier lands with startling gentleness, like something new and delicate unfolding between them. She's read enough stories to know this dynamic by heart; best friends kissing is practically a genre unto itself. It's a trope for a reason. Right? ]
[ her heart and the butterflies in her stomach are gurgling inside her; she was not at all expecting sharon to even consider visiting her at all after hours. but now knowing that she possibly will, the shine in her hair heightens—though eventually it tones itself down. the heat blossoms over her cheeks at the word 'bestie', excited that this is official despite the worries roaming behind the curtains.
sharon will be her third best friend, ekko being the first and isha being the second. two she had gained and lost due to horrific tragedies—incidents that she feels she had caused. will sharon follow suit with the rest? will she lose her too in the end because history loves to repeat itself? it's something she doesn't want to dwell on, not something she wants to descend into.
so she turns a blind eye to it, forcing herself to just hyperfocus on sharon and her aura instead—not that it's difficult to; she's so alluring. with a bashful chuckle and her front teeth yanking on her lower lip, jinx ducks her head back down to her chest—settling herself again. ]
Juuuuust so we're on the same page here. ... You do wanna fuck me, right? Not now, but. Ya know.
[ because why beat around the bush about it now, especially with the way they were just a few moments ago. ]
I mean, I want to fuck you now. I just have self-control, and... [ She exhales hard, cheeks puffing for a beat as if she's trying to steady the rush of her pulse. A flicker of nerves rises where confidence had been moments earlier, and she suddenly isn't sure how much she should admit. Beyond sharing a home with two other tethers... ] I might have some, uh... [ Another pause, another hitch in her breath, and she forces the word out despite the tightness of her chest. ] Trauma, I guess. That's probably the best way to put it, and I don't want to kill the mood.
[ None of this is Jinx's fault. Jinx hasn't sparked any panic, no whiff of that awful mix of bleach and tobacco the janitor always reeked of, no shadow of cruelty in the way she touches or looks at her. They've kept things light, careful, playful. Wandering hands, yes, but nothing overt, nothing that pushed too far.
Still, it's not something Sharon has really let herself think about since becoming whole again. A nightmare or two, maybe, but even letting her mind drift toward that territory makes her muscles threaten to seize up like a rabbit realizing it's already between a wolf's teeth. ]
[ she mumbles, now sucking in her lips hard in a way to prevent herself from saying anything or doing anything out of line. jinx wanted sharon to take the wheel of this whole relationship/friendship they're having because people often say they could handle her when, in reality, they can't. but now it seems allowing sharon be in charge was the right call from the start. ]
Uhm. You don't gotta come over if it's... too much. Or. Something. I don't want to make you feel like I'm pushing you into it just because I'm, uh, about to pop. Heh...
[ it's the best way she can describe it, too. all her life, even up to now, she felt like she was this ugly duckling and her older sibling was the beautiful swan. even before caitlyn, vi always had some girl flaunting over her; boy wanted to be with her regardless of her preference, and then there were people like mylo and herself who wanted to impress her or just be her.
jealousy had always been a part of jinx and while that emotion had been diminished significantly, it still prickles across her skin when she least expects it. whenever she sees or hears kalmiya on the murmur, that is when it claws at her the most. ... her body must be so perfect, and her personality is probably what everyone fantasizes about in a woman. oh, to be touched and loved on by someone. but jinx, herself, has be a looker too, right? because why else would sharon, the coolest and hottest girl in the city, possibly do any of this with her? ]
You can punch me any time if I do something stupid.
[ About to pop? The phrase pulls a soft laugh from her. Sharon lets her fingers drift through Jinx's hair, slow and careful so she doesn't snag a single strand, mulling her next words in thoughtful quiet. ]
I didn't bring it up because I'm trying to back out. I'm telling you just in case. [ It's a safeguard, really, and the idea of reacting badly when she's obviously into this is embarrassing enough without accidentally hurting Jinx's feelings on top of it. Her voice smooths into something warmer. ] If something goes wrong, I don't want you thinking it's because of you, or that I'm not very into all of this. [ The very comes with a playful lilt, a little spark beneath it. ]
But I will punch you if you do anything stupid. [ There's a smile tucked into her tone as she glances down at Jinx, nestled comfortably against her chest again. ] That applies all the time, right?
[ just in case, she says, and her muscles relax, and she melts into her friend, now knowing without a doubt that this is a mutual feeling and not at all a result of her becoming pushy. because she can be sometimes, she's aware. it's life lesson number fifty-three of silco's "how to be empowered"— if you want something, take it; don't let anyone tell you that you are not worthy of having what you desire. let nothing come between you and your wants. if someone or something steps in the way, eliminate it or them.
granted, eliminating someone or something that will threaten to rip her new best friend away from her arms is very much still in the cards, and she will do it without a second thought. but as far as she can tell, no one here poses such a danger.
... except ash, maybe, the girl who claims she isn't at all mirroring jinx and yet seems to have a lot of the same characteristics. even almost down to ash's family members having the same mannerisms as hers. it's eerie, especially when she also seems to have a decent friendship with sharon. it's a coincidence; all of it is just a coincidence. but as she told her friend in the apartment, sniping her personality is where she draws the line. the bluenette huffs out a tiny giggle and shakes her head at sharon's words and her own thoughts as she crinkles up her face, teasingly. ]
Woah, easy there, Toots. I don't have enough makeup to cover up all the shiners.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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of course, her father wasn't an additional voice that rang in her head throughout her days, but... the twinkle between her and sharon is something so different from all of her loved ones. it's almost in a line with a certain boy savior who can fill her stomach with butterflies the exact same way. ]
Heh, yeah. He'd want me to stalk the entire city and give him all the intel. Who is the weakest parasite to the most threatening.
[a breath escape her lips, her shoulders going slump but relaxed—content.]
Buuuuut instead! Here I am.... doing this.
[ and it's not a bad this, it's a lovely this. a this she wants to have more often if she had things her way. ]
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Sharon shifts, sitting up just enough to slip an arm around Jinx's waist and pull her back down against her chest. ]
You make it sound like this would be a waste of your time if he were here. [ Softly. The idea doesn't sit right with her. ] It's not like we do this all the time. [ Though truthfully, they've done it enough that it's started to feel easy—comfortable. ]
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Wait, no. That's not what I... — [ a sigh leaves her chest, giving up on trying to justify herself as she burrows more into her friend. relax, try again. don't let the "jinx" take this moment away. ]
When it comes to you and... this? It'll never be a waste of time for me.
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For you, sure, but what if Silco showed up? [ There's no challenge in her tone, no spark meant to provoke, just quiet curiosity, a genuine question about what might shift between them if he appeared. ]
laptop, please work with me here.
'it's only us.'
'you're the only one i can trust with this, jinx.'
'you're my daughter, i'll never forsake you.'
'i am your family, everyone else betrays us.'
'there is nothing about this place that is home except you.'
her heart aches, and sharon can feel the desire to hold, to soothe, to cradle silco's face from jinx regardless of whether he is just a voice. but hearing it all again makes her want to sprint into the fire to save him just so he wouldn't have to deal with the torment of loneliness. ]
... I'll have a talk with him. Tell him that no matter what or who I let in, he will always be my number one man. I won't abandon him just because I like you and I want you around.
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And if he continues to disapprove? [ She might not have asked before, but having met him in the dream changes things—he could show up, and then what? She resumes smoothing Jinx's hair, soft and steady. ] I'm not really worried if he does, but... I'd rather our friendship not cause issues.
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Silco wants me happy, and he won't do things that'll make me upset. He's... broken. Like I am. He's hurting a lot inside... so he thinks differently. He just needs people to like him and love him like I do. Accept him for who he is.
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She calls Silco broken—calls herself broken. Hurt people hurt people. Sharon knows that all too well. ] Ah, so I'm gonna have to win him over, huh? Classic romcom setup. [ Her tone lightens, and she gives Jinx a gentle nudge, coaxing her to look up. ]
You're not broken, by the way. Or at least, that's not how I see you.
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the bluenette focuses on her face, searching for any wrinkles or twitch of something that could tell her she is only saying so to boost her confidence, because it's the "right thing to say" in a moment like this. but when she comes empty-handed and see that sharon isn't telling her just because she is being kind, that familiar blush returns for an encore. ]
How... do... you see me?
[ the question sprints past her before she could tug it back, suddenly now nervous about what the answer is going to be. if she doesn't see her broken, then what? a lunatic? that's usually the next step. and with how she behaved during the abandon apartment with all the broken glass, sharon must see her as some individual who needs to be tucked away in cell and away from society. .... right? ]
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Yeah, you're a little messed up, but everyone here is. You've got ghosts rattling around in your head, and trust me, I wonder what's going on in there sometimes— [ she adds, softer, almost teasing, ] —but that doesn't make you broken. It just means you've been through too much—way more than someone your age should have.
[ Trauma stacks up. Sharon knows that better than most. She twines a strand of Jinx's hair around her finger, gentle. ] But past all that? You're smart. Weird in a good way. Creative. Even if you were broken, everything else about you more than balances the scales.
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so she concentrates on her lips instead; it's somehow becoming more of a magnetic pull for her as her eyes faintly mist into tears. jinx doesn't know why exactly, maybe because her words are just that sweet and it's putting some sting in her eyelids. but when her lips stop moving, and they sit there still and awaiting her response, jinx inches closer—her heart leaping to her ears now to scream its pulsating song.
her eyes dance between those lips and sharon's blues, afraid to push more, but gravity seems to override everything. what's the worst that can happen? she turns away, pushes her, and tells her to get out or this shouldn't be in this reality but in the other. she should say something, right? ]
... I.
no subject
She wets her lips, catching the lower one lightly between her teeth for a breath before leaning in, a little clumsy, to brush their mouths together. This time she doesn't pull back quickly; unlike their first fleeting kiss, Sharon lets this one stretch out, warm and slow. After all, what's the worst that can happen? ]
no subject
jinx leans into the kiss just a smidge, not too hard, but deep enough to emphasize that this, this little moment right here, is something she won't protest about if it decides to cross their path again in the future. it's a silent way of her offering a proposition.
with their situation being so horrid and filled with so much ache, if sharon wants to feel nice for a change, to feel at peace, or to forget what's going on outside their walls, their kiss can be her or their little escape. and as their kiss continues to linger, jinx's lock drifts unnaturally again with no wind or being underneath the sea—except now it's shining. their tether is matching the gleam of her hair, the thread thickening and glossy with affection, care, and loyalty. her hand inches to cup her cheek, and jinx parts her lips to only lap her tongue across sharon's lower lip briefly before sealing them for another closed kiss.
it's another future offer (if she is translating what she is saying well enough). that if she is hurting anywhere, physically—she's okay with exchanging a kiss as an antidote. and speaking of, there might be some extra tingling sensation between their lips now thanks to that. ]
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The slow drag of Jinx's tongue against her lower lip feels like an invitation, and Sharon answers with her own, nudging softly, coaxing Jinx's lips apart so she can slip in with a hunger that grows with every stolen breath. Her thoughts move thick and sluggish, like cold molasses, barely registering the way Jinx's hair has begun to float on its own, or how that faint blue glow catches at the edge of her vision.
It makes the moment feel like magic.
Their tether hums with want, with ache, and Sharon leans into it, sliding an arm around Jinx's narrow waist to draw her closer, unwilling to let space form between them. The warmth pooling low in her belly pushes aside any shame or hesitation that might've once made her pull back.
She's familiar with wanting—she's never been good at giving in to it. But as she does, the air fills with the scent of a warm, woody vanilla, rich and sweet. ]
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as a child, jinx thought all of these myths were full of boloney, because how can mashing lips together make you feel anything? but once she gets seduced to part her lips and their tongues begin to waltz together, her heart suddenly swells and the world swirls around her.
it feels as if the two of them are sinking through the mattress, past the foam and springs, to descend steadily into the abyss of... not darkness, in essence, but a private realm where no one could find them or hurt them—where jinx can be selfish and have sharon to herself for a little while, or for however long she is allowing her to have her.
when she gets tugged close, her body shifts and presses onto her friend's, and her free hand grips tight onto the fabric of her top. her tongue swirls more with hers, and she embraces their tether to reveal the same want. there's a hint of desire there too, to be her close friend, to be the one who she'll do... this to, and if she ever wants to push through this first door and scale up the stairs to the next one, she'll be willing to explore with her. there's a thick of wanting to take care of her, to protect her, to make her happy, smile, and fulfill all of her wishes—whenever she's ready, to just say the word.
jinx breaks their kiss, but only for a millisecond to breathe, to take in the lovely sweet aroma before sinking right back on her lips. is kissing meant to be intoxicating? so bewitching? maybe that's why kalmiya and others have been doing what they've been doing. it all feels too lovely to quit. ]
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A million more thoughts race through her mind as the kiss deepens, yet the more Jinx leans in, the faster those thoughts blink out, like someone killing the lights one by one, until there's only this: them, pressed together, embracing in more ways than one. Breathing becomes an afterthought.
Hell, everything becomes an afterthought.
As they sink further into the pile of blankets, Sharon shifts, bringing her free hand up to thread her fingers through Jinx's blue hair. Their tether hums with pure want—a starving kind of need she didn't know she could possess. This closeness is intoxicating, almost unreal, and she has no desire whatsoever for it to stop. Maybe it just feels good to feel wanted. ]
Is this what you [ she whispers against her lips between each sloppy, needy kiss ] expected when you came over?
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No. [ the crow coos back, stealing a few more feverish kisses from her before saying more. ] But I don't wanna quit. Do you?
[ sure, they'll have to stop kissing sometime, but she prods how she feels through their tether—how she doesn't want this to be like their first, where they kissed once and then never spoke of it again or did it ever again until now.
she's not sure what this means for their friendship, if it will make things more complicated, or if they'll just be two people who shove their tongues down their throats from time to time. all she knows right now is being intimate with sharon feels nice, making her feel desirable and cared for, and vice versa feels nice. and she doesn't want any of this to stop or go away—it's all too comfortable. ]
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Touching Jinx is its own kind of pleasure. She's all sharp angles and wiry strength, hip bones brushing beneath Sharon's palm, but her skin is soft and slick in that strange way Sharon has grown used to. It yields under her fingertips, inviting and warm. ]
But we probably should soon. It's, uh... [ She eases back a little with a breathy laugh, face flushed, lips shining from their kiss. ] It's kinda weird to go full hot and heavy with Arthur and Freddie still in the house.
[ There's more she wants, but that thought alone sends a fluttering rush through her stomach, a nervous excitement she isn't used to. Not even stepping into a new identity for the first time ever felt like this. This is something else entirely. ]
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Then... [ she starts, planting a quick and tiny kiss to her earlobe. ] — What about visiting me...i-in my head? Later. Tonight. When everyone's asleep? Just for a little while?
[ if physically is a no-go because of nerves and the embarrassment of getting caught in the act, then why not use their tether to their advantage? when her lips jerk away from her ear, her thoughts rush through before she can say the words herself. ]
'I want to be your best friend. I want you to know that I really mean it.'
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Then Jinx's thoughts slip into her mind, a featherlight whisper that makes her scalp tingle. Sharon turns, studying her, blue eyes locked on pink. ] Don't worry. I don't doubt it.
[ Best friend. Best friend. The weight of the modifier lands with startling gentleness, like something new and delicate unfolding between them. She's read enough stories to know this dynamic by heart; best friends kissing is practically a genre unto itself. It's a trope for a reason. Right? ]
Bestie. [ She murmurs with a smile. ]
cw: nsfw blunt silliness
sharon will be her third best friend, ekko being the first and isha being the second. two she had gained and lost due to horrific tragedies—incidents that she feels she had caused. will sharon follow suit with the rest? will she lose her too in the end because history loves to repeat itself? it's something she doesn't want to dwell on, not something she wants to descend into.
so she turns a blind eye to it, forcing herself to just hyperfocus on sharon and her aura instead—not that it's difficult to; she's so alluring. with a bashful chuckle and her front teeth yanking on her lower lip, jinx ducks her head back down to her chest—settling herself again. ]
Juuuuust so we're on the same page here. ... You do wanna fuck me, right? Not now, but. Ya know.
[ because why beat around the bush about it now, especially with the way they were just a few moments ago. ]
cw: very mild ref to sa
[ None of this is Jinx's fault. Jinx hasn't sparked any panic, no whiff of that awful mix of bleach and tobacco the janitor always reeked of, no shadow of cruelty in the way she touches or looks at her. They've kept things light, careful, playful. Wandering hands, yes, but nothing overt, nothing that pushed too far.
Still, it's not something Sharon has really let herself think about since becoming whole again. A nightmare or two, maybe, but even letting her mind drift toward that territory makes her muscles threaten to seize up like a rabbit realizing it's already between a wolf's teeth. ]
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[ she mumbles, now sucking in her lips hard in a way to prevent herself from saying anything or doing anything out of line. jinx wanted sharon to take the wheel of this whole relationship/friendship they're having because people often say they could handle her when, in reality, they can't. but now it seems allowing sharon be in charge was the right call from the start. ]
Uhm. You don't gotta come over if it's... too much. Or. Something. I don't want to make you feel like I'm pushing you into it just because I'm, uh, about to pop. Heh...
[ it's the best way she can describe it, too. all her life, even up to now, she felt like she was this ugly duckling and her older sibling was the beautiful swan. even before caitlyn, vi always had some girl flaunting over her; boy wanted to be with her regardless of her preference, and then there were people like mylo and herself who wanted to impress her or just be her.
jealousy had always been a part of jinx and while that emotion had been diminished significantly, it still prickles across her skin when she least expects it. whenever she sees or hears kalmiya on the murmur, that is when it claws at her the most. ... her body must be so perfect, and her personality is probably what everyone fantasizes about in a woman. oh, to be touched and loved on by someone. but jinx, herself, has be a looker too, right? because why else would sharon, the coolest and hottest girl in the city, possibly do any of this with her? ]
You can punch me any time if I do something stupid.
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I didn't bring it up because I'm trying to back out. I'm telling you just in case. [ It's a safeguard, really, and the idea of reacting badly when she's obviously into this is embarrassing enough without accidentally hurting Jinx's feelings on top of it. Her voice smooths into something warmer. ] If something goes wrong, I don't want you thinking it's because of you, or that I'm not very into all of this. [ The very comes with a playful lilt, a little spark beneath it. ]
But I will punch you if you do anything stupid. [ There's a smile tucked into her tone as she glances down at Jinx, nestled comfortably against her chest again. ] That applies all the time, right?
1/2
granted, eliminating someone or something that will threaten to rip her new best friend away from her arms is very much still in the cards, and she will do it without a second thought. but as far as she can tell, no one here poses such a danger.
... except ash, maybe, the girl who claims she isn't at all mirroring jinx and yet seems to have a lot of the same characteristics. even almost down to ash's family members having the same mannerisms as hers. it's eerie, especially when she also seems to have a decent friendship with sharon. it's a coincidence; all of it is just a coincidence. but as she told her friend in the apartment, sniping her personality is where she draws the line. the bluenette huffs out a tiny giggle and shakes her head at sharon's words and her own thoughts as she crinkles up her face, teasingly. ]
Woah, easy there, Toots. I don't have enough makeup to cover up all the shiners.
2/2 cw: schizophrenia
cw: schizophrenia
cw: schizophrenia
cw: schizophrenia
cw: schizophrenia
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