[ And that spikes the concern, the anxiety. A tumultuous rumble in her chest. Sharon is alert now. ]
Yeah. Yeah, of course. [ Her doors will always be open to Lortel. ] I'm at my place at the Nest. [ A second-floor apartment, her name written on a plaque on her front door. ] You can just come in.
it is not exactly a haven of those sympathetic to anyone who'd ever do anything at all for Sleep.
Lortel breathes out, and braves the ghost of a smile. ]
I'll be there soon.
[ she goes with Mikan. riding him is always faster than traveling on foot. though, with a kiss on the head, she'll leave the big cat outside once she reaches the Devil's Nest. he's a bit too massive to bring in with her.
she makes her way up, empty-handed, and finds somewhat to her own surprise that her dread does not grow more acute the closer she gets. she's already expecting the worst, after all.
[ Sharon peeks out from the kitchen the moment Lortel steps inside. ] Hey. I, uh... made tea for us. [ It's cold out, and with the sense of dread hanging between them, Sharon has a feeling they're both going to need something warm. She quickly pours them each a mug before leading Lortel into the living room, setting the drinks down carefully on the small coffee table. ]
Okay, out with it. [ She drops down onto the couch, already tense. ] You've got me anxious as hell. [ There's no point trying to hide it from Lortel. ]
tea. something about it makes her expression do something funny, a slight, crooked smile touching the corners of her mouth beneath a deeply furrowed brow.
it's sweet, and comforting, and nothing she deserves from Sharon, at the moment.
she'll sit, neither too close nor too far, reaching for the mug of tea and curling both hands around it, holding it in her lap. letting it brace her. the look on her face has returned to something pensive. ]
I spoke to Sleep, yesterday.
[ she lifts a hand, touching the scar over her right eye. her soft voice is entirely without inflection. ]
About this, and... to ask her for her help with rebuilding Columbia. She agreed.
[ There's so much tension here. Sharon can see it in Lortel's furrowed brow, in the stiffness of her shoulders—even in the way she cradles the mug between both hands. And then—that. All Sharon can hear is a high-pitched buzzing in her ears. It swells until it drowns out everything else. Her grip tightens around her mug. She sits a little straighter, shaking her head as though she can physically reject the words she just heard. As though refusing to accept them might somehow make them untrue. ]
Wh-Why? Why would you do that—why? [ The question tumbles out before she can stop it. Sure, Megumi's situation is awful. One's emotions have boiled over, and they're all paying the price—some more than others. She gets that.. She does.
[ her expression pinches. both over Sharon's question and the reaction that comes with it.
frankly, she's relieved Sharon is even willing to ask her why. ]
Columbia...
[ ...
softly: ]
It's too much. Rebuilding Columbia, managing and launching the greenhouse project and keeping it safe, dealing with all the other conflicting forces in the city...
[ she'd not admit this to anyone else. perhaps even Megumi. in a small voice: ]
It's too much. Even for me. I...
[ ...
carefully and rather deliberately she removes her mask, the gauzy veil she weirs tied around her wrist. she sets it on the coffee table, better to reduce the chance of any contact with it. ]
Suppose... that's exactly the kind of desperation she preys upon, in the end. And I've never ... been above making deals with those I hate and distrust.
you two keep going and ignore, jinx is just being nosy and looking at the girls' tether feels.
That's why we work together. That's why you have people you can turn to, fucking friends. [ Waves of betrayal, hurt, and confusion crash through their connection, and Sharon can't hold them back. She can't stop them from flooding into her, can't stop the way they make her chest tighten until it physically hurts. The ache steals her breath. ] It'd be one thing if she—if she wasn't... if that didn't...
[ The words keep slipping away from her. Her thoughts are racing too fast, tripping over emotions she can't get under control. She pushes abruptly to her feet, nearly sloshing tea over the rim of her cup. ] Oh god, what the fuck, Lortel? [ Her voice cracks with disbelief. ] What did she ask from you? What is she taking in return? Because we both know how she works. [ Her gaze is already sweeping over Lortel, searching for something wrong. An injury. A mark. Any visible sign of the price that's been paid. ]
[ she doesn't quite flinch when Sharon curses at her, but she does shut her eyes. she deserves it, every word.
she's never had a friend she could even hurt, before. her guts are twisted up in knots, anxiety pressing on her lungs making it harder to breathe. there is gentle misgiving, if not exactly regret, and a great deal of contrition in response to Sharon's ache.
there won't be any easy way to make this better, but Lortel won't hide her feelings from Sharon. not now. she deserves the whole and complete truth, including her mixed emotions. they're no excuse, of course, but...
it would feel so much worse to lie and try to pretend she felt completely at peace with this decision.
but when she stands Lortel makes a soft sound of alarm, brow furrowing high and tight. one hand lifts in a warding motion. ]
I'm fine. I'm okay, really. What she asked of me in return was ...
[ her gaze cuts to one side; she's frowning. ]
She wants a blood sacrifice. Every two weeks, synced to the cycle of the moon. It can be anyone's blood, including that of a Host. It just has to be blood. With it, I have to paint symbols she showed me on that which I wish to protect...
[ ... ]
I tried, but I couldn't get a straight answer on exactly what painting those symbols would do. For her, I mean. What she gets out of it. I can only presume greater power...
[ another beat. she's biting the corner of her lip, hard. ]
I've no right to ask a thing of you right now, but ... talk to Megumi. He has a plan. And I can't know about it. Not a single thing.
[ she lifts her gaze to meet Sharon's, ill and pale but resolute. ]
I know I can't take back what I've done, but we won't let her have what she wants so easily, either.
[ There's no ignoring Lortel's emotions, and that makes this so much harder to swallow. It's one thing to watch someone play a part; it's another to feel that they mean every word. Something sits on the tip of her tongue, not quite regret, but close enough to taste. A fog begins to creep across the floor, soft white tendrils swallowing the stained carpeting as her abilities react instinctively to her emotions.
Every word makes it worse. Sharon sets the teacup in a planter by the window, afraid she might drop it—or throw it. She can't hate Lortel for this; she doubts she could ever hate Lortel for anything. But that doesn't stop it from hurting. ] A fucking blood sacrifice, Jesus. [ She grimaces as she processes. Not horrified. Just unsettled. Her arms fold tightly across her chest. And Sleep couldn't even give Lortel an answer, couldn't tell her why she'd be doing it or what she stood to gain. Still, Sharon draws in a breath and forces herself to keep listening. ]
A plan—That's... [ The words die beneath an exhale. Lortel already knows she'll agree. Sharon holds the girl's gaze, blue eyes gone hard and black. ] I'll talk to him, but... [ Her voice drops, hauntingly layered, as if more than one of her were speaking, and heavy. ] You can't do this again, Lortel. [ The warning falls from her lips like a threat. Can't sounds a whole lot like Better Not. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Yeah. Yeah, of course. [ Her doors will always be open to Lortel. ] I'm at my place at the Nest. [ A second-floor apartment, her name written on a plaque on her front door. ] You can just come in.
no subject
of course. Jinx is there. Greed. Silco.
it is not exactly a haven of those sympathetic to anyone who'd ever do anything at all for Sleep.
Lortel breathes out, and braves the ghost of a smile. ]
I'll be there soon.
[ she goes with Mikan. riding him is always faster than traveling on foot. though, with a kiss on the head, she'll leave the big cat outside once she reaches the Devil's Nest. he's a bit too massive to bring in with her.
she makes her way up, empty-handed, and finds somewhat to her own surprise that her dread does not grow more acute the closer she gets. she's already expecting the worst, after all.
and she'll simply let herself in, as told. ]
Sharon?
no subject
Okay, out with it. [ She drops down onto the couch, already tense. ] You've got me anxious as hell. [ There's no point trying to hide it from Lortel. ]
no subject
tea. something about it makes her expression do something funny, a slight, crooked smile touching the corners of her mouth beneath a deeply furrowed brow.
it's sweet, and comforting, and nothing she deserves from Sharon, at the moment.
she'll sit, neither too close nor too far, reaching for the mug of tea and curling both hands around it, holding it in her lap. letting it brace her. the look on her face has returned to something pensive. ]
I spoke to Sleep, yesterday.
[ she lifts a hand, touching the scar over her right eye. her soft voice is entirely without inflection. ]
About this, and... to ask her for her help with rebuilding Columbia. She agreed.
no subject
Wh-Why? Why would you do that—why? [ The question tumbles out before she can stop it. Sure, Megumi's situation is awful. One's emotions have boiled over, and they're all paying the price—some more than others. She gets that.. She does.
But to ask that bitch for help? ]
no subject
frankly, she's relieved Sharon is even willing to ask her why. ]
Columbia...
[ ...
softly: ]
It's too much. Rebuilding Columbia, managing and launching the greenhouse project and keeping it safe, dealing with all the other conflicting forces in the city...
[ she'd not admit this to anyone else. perhaps even Megumi. in a small voice: ]
It's too much. Even for me. I...
[ ...
carefully and rather deliberately she removes her mask, the gauzy veil she weirs tied around her wrist. she sets it on the coffee table, better to reduce the chance of any contact with it. ]
Suppose... that's exactly the kind of desperation she preys upon, in the end. And I've never ... been above making deals with those I hate and distrust.
you two keep going and ignore, jinx is just being nosy and looking at the girls' tether feels.
no subject
[ The words keep slipping away from her. Her thoughts are racing too fast, tripping over emotions she can't get under control. She pushes abruptly to her feet, nearly sloshing tea over the rim of her cup. ] Oh god, what the fuck, Lortel? [ Her voice cracks with disbelief. ] What did she ask from you? What is she taking in return? Because we both know how she works. [ Her gaze is already sweeping over Lortel, searching for something wrong. An injury. A mark. Any visible sign of the price that's been paid. ]
no subject
she's never had a friend she could even hurt, before. her guts are twisted up in knots, anxiety pressing on her lungs making it harder to breathe. there is gentle misgiving, if not exactly regret, and a great deal of contrition in response to Sharon's ache.
there won't be any easy way to make this better, but Lortel won't hide her feelings from Sharon. not now. she deserves the whole and complete truth, including her mixed emotions. they're no excuse, of course, but...
it would feel so much worse to lie and try to pretend she felt completely at peace with this decision.
but when she stands Lortel makes a soft sound of alarm, brow furrowing high and tight. one hand lifts in a warding motion. ]
I'm fine. I'm okay, really. What she asked of me in return was ...
[ her gaze cuts to one side; she's frowning. ]
She wants a blood sacrifice. Every two weeks, synced to the cycle of the moon. It can be anyone's blood, including that of a Host. It just has to be blood. With it, I have to paint symbols she showed me on that which I wish to protect...
[ ... ]
I tried, but I couldn't get a straight answer on exactly what painting those symbols would do. For her, I mean. What she gets out of it. I can only presume greater power...
[ another beat. she's biting the corner of her lip, hard. ]
I've no right to ask a thing of you right now, but ... talk to Megumi. He has a plan. And I can't know about it. Not a single thing.
[ she lifts her gaze to meet Sharon's, ill and pale but resolute. ]
I know I can't take back what I've done, but we won't let her have what she wants so easily, either.
no subject
Every word makes it worse. Sharon sets the teacup in a planter by the window, afraid she might drop it—or throw it. She can't hate Lortel for this; she doubts she could ever hate Lortel for anything. But that doesn't stop it from hurting. ] A fucking blood sacrifice, Jesus. [ She grimaces as she processes. Not horrified. Just unsettled. Her arms fold tightly across her chest. And Sleep couldn't even give Lortel an answer, couldn't tell her why she'd be doing it or what she stood to gain. Still, Sharon draws in a breath and forces herself to keep listening. ]
A plan—That's... [ The words die beneath an exhale. Lortel already knows she'll agree. Sharon holds the girl's gaze, blue eyes gone hard and black. ] I'll talk to him, but... [ Her voice drops, hauntingly layered, as if more than one of her were speaking, and heavy. ] You can't do this again, Lortel. [ The warning falls from her lips like a threat. Can't sounds a whole lot like Better Not. ]